I started a little channel on Disqus in 2016, and have participated in
discussions on various platforms for over a decade now. It has become very
common to criticize social dynamics online, whether discussed in terms of
"trolling," cyber-bullying, the dimunition of "civility," the frequently
observed obsession with being "liked" and "followed" as a source of self-esteem
and validation, or other related issues that have received attention in social
discourse. While the resulting literature is often thoughtful (Sherry Turkle's
Alone Together and Jaron Lanier's manifesto, I Am Not A
Gadget, https://cmapspublic3.ihmc.us/rid=1MHHS4T68-C8ZML1-6DRW/YouAreNotAGadget-Jaron%20Lanier.pdf come to mind), the problem that I'm concerned with here is
more narrowly focused. My focus here is on only one of the many
problems mentioned above. To keep things simple, I'll describe the
problem in terms borrowed from educational theorist, Alfie Kohn, in his
book, No Conflict (1991). He coined a useful acronym to get at the basic issue, "MEGA." MEGA stands for MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE
GOAL ATTAINMENT, and the psychology underlying it has deep roots in theories of cooperation and conflict.
The underlying core-belief in MEGA is that when people discuss
issues on which different and strong positions/viewpoints exist, it is generally
the case that it can best be understood as a "conflict" or "debate" in which one
party's gain entails the other's loss (as in a zero-sum-game). Like our adversarial legal system, it
presupposes that there must be a "winner" and "loser" on any issue of
importance. The binary of "win" and "lose" carries with it an attitude (ranging
from subtle to overt) of basic enmity. This comes up again and again whether the mutually
exclusive categories are framed in terms of political affiliation, musical taste, philosophical
theories, religious beliefs, sports or even seemingly innocuous topics like TV
shows and favorite celebrities.
Back in the aughts, I began to notice
youtube philosophy vids (youtube was still new then) formatted as
"point-counterpoint" debates. My academic background was largely in
philosophy,
and so I was, at first, intrigued. One person would post a thesis or
argument,
and another person would publish a rejoinder in which he or she (usually
he at the time, though this has changed) tries to "defeat" the other party. If Sam argues for, say, "free
will,"
then the response by Bill will be the most forceful attempt to show that
Sam's
view is dead wrong in no uncertain terms. Such debates have a place in
traditional philosophy, but they also have limits. Both parties may have
insights, for example, and neither may have a full and adequate account
of the
complex concept of free will. So there's a potential loss in terms of
learning from one another or engaging in cooperative inquiry.
This can be generalized to most complex conceptual discussions. If my
sole
focus is on "winning" an argument (where that entails the other party
"loses")
then I will selectively attend to what I see as the "weak points" in the
other's
presentation, and vice versa. I may (subliminally or consciously) skip
over
those portions of the content that might otherwise spur healthy
*discussion* and
exploration, rather than win/lose debates. It's like reducing all
political
discussion to Crossfire, the old show pitting "Left" and "Right" against
each
other. I still remember when Jon Stewart went there to satirize these
hosts
(esp. a young Tucker Carlson), which contributed to CNN canning the
show. But
the "Crossfire" mentality was never "canceled," and no matter how
erudite the
topic, one finds a similar interactive and cognitive style at work in
many
online venues, including "academic Twitter," where professors and grad
students are free to express themselves in ways not entirely compatible
with the norms of the classroom.
The collapse of discussion into binary debating patterns carries
more serious threats to culture than the loss of learning opportunities, though.
When watching those vids back in 2006-7, I was put off by the hacker/gamer slang being used
in the content, comments and titles. Typical examples might be "Sam OWNS Bill," or the offshoot, "Sam PWNS
Bill" on the Question of Free Will/Existence of God/fill-in-the blank-debate.
Gamer slang had colonized online public philosophy and other "erudite" realms of discourse
online. According to a Wikipedia article, "the term
["pwn"] implies domination or humiliation of a rival, used primarily in the
internet gaming culture to taunt an opponent who has just been soundly
defeated." https://www.abc.net.au/mediawatch/transcripts/0940_pwned.pdf It was taken by teenagers and young adult from the world of
hackers where pwning basically meant controlling or compromising another
computer or server. So this is more than winning a binary debate, it has a *hostile*
connotation, to put it mildly. Ownership of another person is, by
definition, chattel slavery. While this is obviously not what is being
endorsed online, the meanings of words have consequences, and as
authors like George Lakoff have argued, the "metaphors we live by" say
much about our underlying cognitive and social structures. (see his book
with Mark Johnson, Metaphors We Live By: U of Chicago: 1980). These terms, and the metaphors they invoke (e.g. "ownership" of another) seem to encourage some degree of dehumanization of those with whom we disagree.
More recently, during the 2010s, we've seen the strategical
application of these terms, as in the case of "owning the libs."
Self-described "liberals" and "progressives," on the other hand, tend to use
more generic insults including "moron," "loon," "loser" and "idiot" to label
opponents on the Right. https://qz.com/291533/this-is-how-liberals-and-conservatives-insult-each-other/
There are certainly high-stakes conflicts in policy, but
depicting them in terms more appropriate to a grade-school playground
than town hall meeting actually
obscures and emotionalizes matters, generating more heat than light. It
dumbs down
political culture ever more drastically, and engenders a culture of
round-the-clock toxic hostility. While it's true that in politics the
history of this hostile style of
discourse owes more to Right Wing radio shows than it does to Left Wing
culture,
this doesn't explain the appeal of the hostile MEGA interaction style
now pervading
discussions in domains as "refined" as philosophy, or religion among
people across the political spectrum. For example, the New Atheism
debates-- both pro and con-- of the noughties were characterized by much
of the
"pwning" and "owning" tropes; and discussions in that domain are still
largely
fought in crudely insulting and aggressive terms, even if the slang has
changed.
I think it's easy for most of us to spot
these behavioral traits and patterns in others, but how
carefully do we evaluate our own output? Why does a blog-site like this
one need to state, as
a "rule," no less, "Don't be an asshole?" I'm not criticizing
the rule, but questioning the conditions that give rise to it. Surely it
is
addressed to the actual and potential users of this site. To me, to you,
to all. We think nothing of
such "rules" at this point. It's a perfectly reasonable reminder given
the state
of interaction these days, right? I find it telling that such a "rule"
blends into the background of consciousness like wallpaper. That is, it
does not appear to jolt, jar, surprise or confuse anyone (correct me if
I'm wrong and it has surprised you in the past). In a sense, it is an
acknowledgment of one of the most serious problems we face today in
culture and
politics, and it would be interesting to see a calmly written post on
exactly
what it is that makes one an "asshole" online. What are the criteria?
When did
the traits in question become so omnipresent as to require such rules
and
warnings? What have we let ourselves become? How might we move towards
more
humane encounters with one another?
I have not answered those questions here.
This is intended more as a spur to further thought on the issue. I think it's
important to note that from the beginning of Web 2.0 (from the aughts to
present), this mentality or interpersonal style was not originally linked solely
to politics, but came from a gamer (win or lose) MEGA mentality, in which others
are experienced as adversaries to be dominated and humiliated rather than
potential partners in prosocial dialogue and discussion. So, while this has
certainly been evident and toxic in our politics, the mentality is deeper.
Perhaps, in another OP, I will explore socio-historical roots of the problem.
But for now I'm more interested in hearing from others.
Questions:
Am I exaggerating the
problem?
Do you think the problem is unique to a certain
ideological/political/cultural groups that you oppose, or do you see it as a
pervasive aspect of communication in culture and society?
Have you ever insulted
others in the heat of the moment while writing comments? Have you ever been hurt
or upset as the recipient of such insults? What do you think are some of the
causes of this phenomenon, and how might it be diminished and/or counteracted?